Thursday, November 13, 2003
crime rateapparantly, this townhas the highest crime rate per capita in the world.
unbelievable.
so i tell this guy, who's a nurse (no its not a gay bar), how i walk home, and he tells me in no uncertain terms to get a taxi. dont walk. do not walk. hence the bollox with the bike earlier. he says he's seen people in A and E with their heads smashed in. great.
inner tubes
so im fixing this stupid bike someone has lent me ( i know why now) cos it has a puncture, and i fix the puncture, put the tube back in and , bang, puncture it again trying to get the bugger back in.
so i fix it again.
then , i put the tube back in, and its about an inch too fucking big! it has a giant kink in it.
well, i think bollox to it, and ride it anyway. it burst about 20 yards down the street.
so now im going to look for a new one.
bastards. bring back solid wheels i say.
so im fixing this stupid bike someone has lent me ( i know why now) cos it has a puncture, and i fix the puncture, put the tube back in and , bang, puncture it again trying to get the bugger back in.
so i fix it again.
then , i put the tube back in, and its about an inch too fucking big! it has a giant kink in it.
well, i think bollox to it, and ride it anyway. it burst about 20 yards down the street.
so now im going to look for a new one.
bastards. bring back solid wheels i say.
establishing you're not gay
it seems to be if you meet a kiwi or an aussie bloke, and when you meet them for the first time, if you arent actually having sex with a woman in front of them right then , they think you're a bloody poof mate. you have to spend the next half hour making gay jokes before they accept you as a fair dinkum right footed player.
still, its quite funny. and they do it to everybody , not just me. the fact that i was wearing crotchless leather trousers with the bottom cut out has nothing to do with it.
it seems to be if you meet a kiwi or an aussie bloke, and when you meet them for the first time, if you arent actually having sex with a woman in front of them right then , they think you're a bloody poof mate. you have to spend the next half hour making gay jokes before they accept you as a fair dinkum right footed player.
still, its quite funny. and they do it to everybody , not just me. the fact that i was wearing crotchless leather trousers with the bottom cut out has nothing to do with it.
fiesty irish women
try working behind a bar with 2 of them. its life on a knife-edge as anything can set them off. especially when you turn up wearing a balaclava.
all it takes is a misunderstanding and its instant death stare, which can put a man out of commision for up to 3 hours.
try working behind a bar with 2 of them. its life on a knife-edge as anything can set them off. especially when you turn up wearing a balaclava.
all it takes is a misunderstanding and its instant death stare, which can put a man out of commision for up to 3 hours.
Tuesday, November 11, 2003
gulaassaw one, well, lots actually, today. its wasnt flaming though. still, quite pretty.
car alarms
went out on the piss last night with this girl emma who is going to give me a life to sydney via cooper pedy, the flinders ranges and the great ocean road in her camper van.
we were on our way back to our accomodation, and she needed a piss. so she went and squatted behind this car in a the bowling alley car park. it was about 2am, noone about. bowling alley closed.
about 40 seconds after she started, the hazards flash on the car as the alarm disarms and some bloke walks round the corner to find her pissing next to his car!
went out on the piss last night with this girl emma who is going to give me a life to sydney via cooper pedy, the flinders ranges and the great ocean road in her camper van.
we were on our way back to our accomodation, and she needed a piss. so she went and squatted behind this car in a the bowling alley car park. it was about 2am, noone about. bowling alley closed.
about 40 seconds after she started, the hazards flash on the car as the alarm disarms and some bloke walks round the corner to find her pissing next to his car!
more signs
saw a great sign the other day at simpsons gap. it was next to a sandy, bone dry river bed. it said "No diving". which i thought was quite funny.
saw a great sign the other day at simpsons gap. it was next to a sandy, bone dry river bed. it said "No diving". which i thought was quite funny.
stupid signs
forgot about this, used a liter of "unsuitable for drinking" water from the campsite at red bank to cook with. the water tap was in the middle of the cooking area. the sign was 30 feet away from it at the entrance to the campsite. bloody great. good work! so have been worried about my arse collapsing for the past few days. but it seems to be ok.
forgot about this, used a liter of "unsuitable for drinking" water from the campsite at red bank to cook with. the water tap was in the middle of the cooking area. the sign was 30 feet away from it at the entrance to the campsite. bloody great. good work! so have been worried about my arse collapsing for the past few days. but it seems to be ok.
coming in threes
well, things are supposed to come in 3's arent they? got a job, got a room, wonder whats next....girls? probably be diorreah (however thats spelt. or smelt.)...
marla has gone to adelaide, never to be seen again probably. katia is back at uluru, and im not going back there, its not the place for me anymore. maybe can catch up with her later in the year if she leaves when her contract finishes.
still, this is a target rich environment....
and now i have my own room...
also, two of the guys im staying with are tour guides....
one of them got pushed home in a shopping trolley last night by three swedish lasses.....this just gets better
well, things are supposed to come in 3's arent they? got a job, got a room, wonder whats next....girls? probably be diorreah (however thats spelt. or smelt.)...
marla has gone to adelaide, never to be seen again probably. katia is back at uluru, and im not going back there, its not the place for me anymore. maybe can catch up with her later in the year if she leaves when her contract finishes.
still, this is a target rich environment....
and now i have my own room...
also, two of the guys im staying with are tour guides....
one of them got pushed home in a shopping trolley last night by three swedish lasses.....this just gets better
House
well well, things are getting better. got a big room in a shared house for 80 bucks a week, which is nothing. got a job....i am a tiger! hear me roar! feel my wrath...!
well well, things are getting better. got a big room in a shared house for 80 bucks a week, which is nothing. got a job....i am a tiger! hear me roar! feel my wrath...!
Jobs
wahey! scored a job at sean irish bar, alice springs. i start in 2 hours.
better get over this hangover fast.....
wahey! scored a job at sean irish bar, alice springs. i start in 2 hours.
better get over this hangover fast.....
bored of the bitch
someone has pointed out to me that everyone is bored of me going on about sarah!
well, dear readers, you may have that opinion, and you are entitled, but this is for me this diary thing. im afraid you may have to put up with more bollocks concerning her yet.
but not now.
nothing like that can enter my head at the moment.
things are on the up.
someone has pointed out to me that everyone is bored of me going on about sarah!
well, dear readers, you may have that opinion, and you are entitled, but this is for me this diary thing. im afraid you may have to put up with more bollocks concerning her yet.
but not now.
nothing like that can enter my head at the moment.
things are on the up.
Sunday, November 09, 2003
beerin at number one, its clear , its cold, and whats more im on 20 a day.
let us rock!
cinnamon bun baskin robins
its such a great flavour. try it.
make sure you get several free tasters of something else before though.
its such a great flavour. try it.
make sure you get several free tasters of something else before though.
bojangles
the local pub is on the web. its called bojangles , alice springs and it has a web cam, so you might see my bald head reflecting back at you on it at some stage in the next 3 weeks. remember we are 8.5 hours ahead. so it may appear that i am actually drinking at breakfast time. which may not be entirely innacurate.....
bojangles
the local pub is on the web. its called bojangles , alice springs and it has a web cam, so you might see my bald head reflecting back at you on it at some stage in the next 3 weeks. remember we are 8.5 hours ahead. so it may appear that i am actually drinking at breakfast time. which may not be entirely innacurate.....
bojangles
milk it
marla cant eat dairy products. this is not a problem in itself. so we purchased lactose free milk from a shop (lactose free milk??? isnt that like dehydrated water?? in the middle of nowhere?? how did that happpen??) and we didnt have room to get any normal stuff, so that was it.
well, to miss quote Douglas adams, its like drinking something thats allmost completely, but not quite, entirely unlike milk.
dont do it is my advice. you do not need that in your life.
marla cant eat dairy products. this is not a problem in itself. so we purchased lactose free milk from a shop (lactose free milk??? isnt that like dehydrated water?? in the middle of nowhere?? how did that happpen??) and we didnt have room to get any normal stuff, so that was it.
well, to miss quote Douglas adams, its like drinking something thats allmost completely, but not quite, entirely unlike milk.
dont do it is my advice. you do not need that in your life.
i want to be a hippy
im thinking abouty buying a van, or a 4wd or something, and being a dirty hippy slacker for a bit. going where i choose when i choose.....
I wish Adie was here to tell me if the one i buy is ok! where are you buddy?? you fancy a short holiday?
as it is im going to have to rely on my mechanic "skills".
so ill probably just trot up to the car and kick the tyres a bit.
hmmm....this is looking like a good option....
theres an 1800cc suburu 4wd for sale here for 2500 dollars. might check it out.
well, see y'all later
take it easy.
kev
im thinking abouty buying a van, or a 4wd or something, and being a dirty hippy slacker for a bit. going where i choose when i choose.....
I wish Adie was here to tell me if the one i buy is ok! where are you buddy?? you fancy a short holiday?
as it is im going to have to rely on my mechanic "skills".
so ill probably just trot up to the car and kick the tyres a bit.
hmmm....this is looking like a good option....
theres an 1800cc suburu 4wd for sale here for 2500 dollars. might check it out.
well, see y'all later
take it easy.
kev
aint going to goa
i dont think ill go back to uluru even if i do get a job. i think that is over for me now and its time to move on. i forgot that there is so much to see yet, and the last thing i need is to be within 10 miles of sarah at the mo.
onwards and upwards....
i dont think ill go back to uluru even if i do get a job. i think that is over for me now and its time to move on. i forgot that there is so much to see yet, and the last thing i need is to be within 10 miles of sarah at the mo.
onwards and upwards....
more decisions
well....i have been asked if i want to go with some people to sydney from here. they leave in about three weeks, and they have a camper van, which is all painted up and looks really cool. they seem nice and the driver , well, she's a bit of a dish. then they go inland up the west to cairns, and then work back down toward sydney again.
sounds fun. am thinking on it.
marla also invited me to go to the flinders ranges with her, to go hiking, but she had pre booked her bus the other day and she left at 6am this morning. what with having the bitch contact me last night, i hadnt had time to think about it, so i havent gone, but could still catch up with her.
well....i have been asked if i want to go with some people to sydney from here. they leave in about three weeks, and they have a camper van, which is all painted up and looks really cool. they seem nice and the driver , well, she's a bit of a dish. then they go inland up the west to cairns, and then work back down toward sydney again.
sounds fun. am thinking on it.
marla also invited me to go to the flinders ranges with her, to go hiking, but she had pre booked her bus the other day and she left at 6am this morning. what with having the bitch contact me last night, i hadnt had time to think about it, so i havent gone, but could still catch up with her.
come on the lions
well.....bring on the welsh...big game tonight....also the irish are playing france. allways nice to see the french get a kicking but i dont think it going to happen...french looked dangerous against scotland before.
well.....bring on the welsh...big game tonight....also the irish are playing france. allways nice to see the french get a kicking but i dont think it going to happen...french looked dangerous against scotland before.
kings canyon pictures
im just trying out some links so hopefully heres what kings canyon looks like:
kings canyon
and theres more
im just trying out some links so hopefully heres what kings canyon looks like:
kings canyon
and theres more
wildlife
wow, forgot, saw rock wallabies and some kangas whilst out hiking. amazingly cute little things. so inquisitive. was one sitting on a rock not 10 yards from us, checking us out, then decided we were no threat and cam down from his rock and went to get a drink from the waterhole...he'd hide behind another rock, take a drink, then stick his head above the rock and check that we were still cool. like he was playing peekabo!
we saw a goanna as well, he just appeared out of nowhere while we were walking down this dry river bank, a lizard about a meter or so long. he was funky. wasnt interested in us, just wanted to stay away. amazing creature.
wow, forgot, saw rock wallabies and some kangas whilst out hiking. amazingly cute little things. so inquisitive. was one sitting on a rock not 10 yards from us, checking us out, then decided we were no threat and cam down from his rock and went to get a drink from the waterhole...he'd hide behind another rock, take a drink, then stick his head above the rock and check that we were still cool. like he was playing peekabo!
we saw a goanna as well, he just appeared out of nowhere while we were walking down this dry river bank, a lizard about a meter or so long. he was funky. wasnt interested in us, just wanted to stay away. amazing creature.
flicking the V's
yeah, forgot this but it was really funny.
me and marla were at uluru, doing the base walk. we came across this cave, and as in all the caves, the top of it has these organic lumps on it, they look like they have been made by something. so , this park ranger guy (green shorts and shirt, ranger type hat) comes up and looks around. so i ask him what the formations are, was it animal made, if so what kind of animal , and he said
"vees"
well, i thought this was some kind of native animal that id never heard of, so i asked him to explain what they were, to which he replied
"enshuldigung, i am not being sure, i am first time here."
for some reason, this bloody german tourist was dressed up as a ranger. of course, the formations were made by killer "vees".
yeah, forgot this but it was really funny.
me and marla were at uluru, doing the base walk. we came across this cave, and as in all the caves, the top of it has these organic lumps on it, they look like they have been made by something. so , this park ranger guy (green shorts and shirt, ranger type hat) comes up and looks around. so i ask him what the formations are, was it animal made, if so what kind of animal , and he said
"vees"
well, i thought this was some kind of native animal that id never heard of, so i asked him to explain what they were, to which he replied
"enshuldigung, i am not being sure, i am first time here."
for some reason, this bloody german tourist was dressed up as a ranger. of course, the formations were made by killer "vees".
just deserts
well, i guess theres the thought that i reaped what i sowed. its quite interesting the similarities between the two endings. almost identical.
well, i guess theres the thought that i reaped what i sowed. its quite interesting the similarities between the two endings. almost identical.
Contact, evolution and more whining
having left uluru, i was keen not to contact sarah again , for a while at least. the only things i have to say aer nasty right now, as i have gone through being upset and am now angry. its a natural evolution, and the time may come where i can talk to her again. right now i dont want her in my head.
so get out! begone....
anyways, she spoiled all that by sending me several texts, which, as much as i didnt want to read them, i couldnt resist.
the first one said its a she didnt know where i was , pity things got nasty and hoping i was well. so i ignored it.
then went hiking, and theres no signal there, (shockingly), so when i got back there was a message from her, saying she'd sent me an email and hoping everything was ok. (which, i think she has sent it to my old account back home, so i wont get it). i tried and tried to resist sending her a reply saying leave me the alone cos anything i say to you will get nasty at present, but i cracked eventually, which started a text conversation.
the result of which was me telling her, as pleasantly as i could which was tricky, not to poison my brain at the moment and would she please just not ruin the peace i had just found, (and i couldnt help it, i had to say something) and that i hoped she could evolve out of the bitch she had evidenly become....
to which she sent me two mails back saying that she was a decent person, that she was just trying to move on and her intentions were honorable and that one day maybe i would see that.
what really bugs me is that she had moved on before i even got here, and she didnt say anything! how honest is that? how honorable? why the fuck didnt she tell me ???!!!!!
she said that she told the bloke shes now with that it was all on hold with him just before i came. how nice is that??
well, i couldnt fit the number of swear words i know into one message for a reply so i left it. maybe ill be able to talk to her in a few weeks time.
untill then she can just fuck off.
having left uluru, i was keen not to contact sarah again , for a while at least. the only things i have to say aer nasty right now, as i have gone through being upset and am now angry. its a natural evolution, and the time may come where i can talk to her again. right now i dont want her in my head.
so get out! begone....
anyways, she spoiled all that by sending me several texts, which, as much as i didnt want to read them, i couldnt resist.
the first one said its a she didnt know where i was , pity things got nasty and hoping i was well. so i ignored it.
then went hiking, and theres no signal there, (shockingly), so when i got back there was a message from her, saying she'd sent me an email and hoping everything was ok. (which, i think she has sent it to my old account back home, so i wont get it). i tried and tried to resist sending her a reply saying leave me the alone cos anything i say to you will get nasty at present, but i cracked eventually, which started a text conversation.
the result of which was me telling her, as pleasantly as i could which was tricky, not to poison my brain at the moment and would she please just not ruin the peace i had just found, (and i couldnt help it, i had to say something) and that i hoped she could evolve out of the bitch she had evidenly become....
to which she sent me two mails back saying that she was a decent person, that she was just trying to move on and her intentions were honorable and that one day maybe i would see that.
what really bugs me is that she had moved on before i even got here, and she didnt say anything! how honest is that? how honorable? why the fuck didnt she tell me ???!!!!!
she said that she told the bloke shes now with that it was all on hold with him just before i came. how nice is that??
well, i couldnt fit the number of swear words i know into one message for a reply so i left it. maybe ill be able to talk to her in a few weeks time.
untill then she can just fuck off.
Big Macs and flies (said the chinese tourist...)
well hello there. this missive finds yours truly in a better state of mind. have just been on a 3 day hike with a girl i met at uluru, marla.
can you imagine me getting up at 6 am (and not minding) and then hiking for 15 kilometers in the burning heat (40 degrees plus at midday....ouch!).
well, neither could i until i actually did.
you know what, i loved it!
did a lot of thinking. did a fair bit of brooding...thinking about what i would really like to say to sarah. nasty things. not good. but then i would realise the awesomeness of my surroundings and that would clear my mind. great stuff. i feel better.
we went to the western mcdonnel ranges , a "range"is like a minuature mountain range. actually, they reckon it is the remnants of a mountain ransge bigger than the himilayas. not very big now. but so beutifull.
all sorts of different coulored rocks, blue, purple, pink, red , fantastic outcrops, unbelievable boulders and amazing gorges. ( and no, im not talking about marla).
one place we went to looked like a cubist picture of a huge rock ....300 foot high and about half a mile long. the whole thing was one giant collection of cubes. quite phenominal.
you wouldnt believe what we did hiking wise, up at 6am, walking all day, or swimming in the beutifull waterholes to rock clambering, getting cut, swimming in gorges with coral snakes in them (apparantly, we didnt see any...there was a swimming millipede though, bastards, they are bad enough on the land, they shouldnt be able to swim too...)
friday night was marvellous, we met this dutch couple and they took us up this 4wd track in their camper van (which nearly rattled to death, and the suspension baging on its stops every five seconds) to see red bank gorge, a place we couldnt get to in our hire car, and we all spent the evening there. it was a full moon, so bright you could read by it, crystal clear sky, no one for miles and miles and these mcdonnel ranges on the horizon, and a fire burning. awesome. like something out of an advert for a nice night out.
swimming the gorge the morning after was incredible. up really early as we had an hours walk, and then a two hour swim (which turned into a 2 hour swim/clamber/rock climb extravaganza) and then an hours walk back. thinking back, we should have done it in the afternoon, as then the water would have been slightly warmer than absolutely bloody freezing. must have been close on 2 or 3 degrees c.
the terrain went from water hole to channels no more than a meter and a half wide with 200 - 300 foot soaring vertical red rock faces on either side...scary as apparantly coral snakes like this place....didnt see any fortunately.
then we would have to clamber 15 feet up a rock face to get over to the next pool / gully or whatever. me and the dutch guy had to stop before the end as we were both freezing, uncontrollable shaking, chattering teeth, numb hands anbd legs...the whole thing. the girls were alright...we put it down to the fact that we were both skinny gits and they, whilst nowhere near fat, certainly had an insulating layer, and a couple of heat sinks each....
so, annoyingly, they made it the last 100 yards or so to the end, and we sat there shaking! now where was that ego again...???
took us about an hour to warm up, the sun would only get into this gorge when it was directly overhead and it wasnt there when we were. then we had to get back into the water and do it all again. was so nice to be in the sun again. then of course, laid in it for about an hour and burnt my back a bit. what a muppet.
just what i needed. did a lot of thinking. did a lot of relaxing, did a lot of exersize. good for the soul.
went to a place called simpsons gap. i had to say the
immortal line
"hmmm....simpsons gap hey...hoy hoy, we'll see about that...i'll show
em...i'll rename it burns gap....smithers, fetch the paperwork"
would have been so cool to have my mate fraser there to do smithers!
heres where we went:
simpsons gap
Standley Chasm
all sorts of shots
glen helen gorge
red bank gorge
red bank gorge
well hello there. this missive finds yours truly in a better state of mind. have just been on a 3 day hike with a girl i met at uluru, marla.
can you imagine me getting up at 6 am (and not minding) and then hiking for 15 kilometers in the burning heat (40 degrees plus at midday....ouch!).
well, neither could i until i actually did.
you know what, i loved it!
did a lot of thinking. did a fair bit of brooding...thinking about what i would really like to say to sarah. nasty things. not good. but then i would realise the awesomeness of my surroundings and that would clear my mind. great stuff. i feel better.
we went to the western mcdonnel ranges , a "range"is like a minuature mountain range. actually, they reckon it is the remnants of a mountain ransge bigger than the himilayas. not very big now. but so beutifull.
all sorts of different coulored rocks, blue, purple, pink, red , fantastic outcrops, unbelievable boulders and amazing gorges. ( and no, im not talking about marla).
one place we went to looked like a cubist picture of a huge rock ....300 foot high and about half a mile long. the whole thing was one giant collection of cubes. quite phenominal.
you wouldnt believe what we did hiking wise, up at 6am, walking all day, or swimming in the beutifull waterholes to rock clambering, getting cut, swimming in gorges with coral snakes in them (apparantly, we didnt see any...there was a swimming millipede though, bastards, they are bad enough on the land, they shouldnt be able to swim too...)
friday night was marvellous, we met this dutch couple and they took us up this 4wd track in their camper van (which nearly rattled to death, and the suspension baging on its stops every five seconds) to see red bank gorge, a place we couldnt get to in our hire car, and we all spent the evening there. it was a full moon, so bright you could read by it, crystal clear sky, no one for miles and miles and these mcdonnel ranges on the horizon, and a fire burning. awesome. like something out of an advert for a nice night out.
swimming the gorge the morning after was incredible. up really early as we had an hours walk, and then a two hour swim (which turned into a 2 hour swim/clamber/rock climb extravaganza) and then an hours walk back. thinking back, we should have done it in the afternoon, as then the water would have been slightly warmer than absolutely bloody freezing. must have been close on 2 or 3 degrees c.
the terrain went from water hole to channels no more than a meter and a half wide with 200 - 300 foot soaring vertical red rock faces on either side...scary as apparantly coral snakes like this place....didnt see any fortunately.
then we would have to clamber 15 feet up a rock face to get over to the next pool / gully or whatever. me and the dutch guy had to stop before the end as we were both freezing, uncontrollable shaking, chattering teeth, numb hands anbd legs...the whole thing. the girls were alright...we put it down to the fact that we were both skinny gits and they, whilst nowhere near fat, certainly had an insulating layer, and a couple of heat sinks each....
so, annoyingly, they made it the last 100 yards or so to the end, and we sat there shaking! now where was that ego again...???
took us about an hour to warm up, the sun would only get into this gorge when it was directly overhead and it wasnt there when we were. then we had to get back into the water and do it all again. was so nice to be in the sun again. then of course, laid in it for about an hour and burnt my back a bit. what a muppet.
just what i needed. did a lot of thinking. did a lot of relaxing, did a lot of exersize. good for the soul.
went to a place called simpsons gap. i had to say the
immortal line
"hmmm....simpsons gap hey...hoy hoy, we'll see about that...i'll show
em...i'll rename it burns gap....smithers, fetch the paperwork"
would have been so cool to have my mate fraser there to do smithers!
heres where we went:
simpsons gap
Standley Chasm
all sorts of shots
glen helen gorge
red bank gorge
red bank gorge
